"Every boy wanted to marry one. Every girl wanted to be one. I call dibs on being Jasmine.
Disney Princesses were the cornerstone for Disney’s success. Pinnochio and Fantasia were great and all, but little kids weren’t screaming to dress up as them for Halloween or have Fantasia themed birthday parties. Cinderella, Snow White, Beauty and the Beast, Little Mermaid, Aladdin - these movies made Disney what it is today. And ladies, Disney has made us what we are today. Whores.
Almost every morning we talk to some extent about how girls are growing up to fast, dressing inappropriately and too sexual. Well look at the role models we have to look up to. Disney Princesses are the spokespeople for abundant cleavage. Ariel and Jasmine basically just wear bras. No mother would ever let their 16 year old daughter run around in that.
Obviously Disney realized that. Which is why they’re anti-mother.
Just take a look at the line of Disney films. The vast majority involve an evil stepmother, a mom who is killed, or no mom at all. A real mom wouldn’t have sent Snow White to live with 7 old men who greet her with ‘Hi Ho!’ A decent maternal presence might have been what Belle needed to NOT fall in love with a bear...dog...lookin thing. There is a serious display of mental instability among the Disney Princesses, perhaps best shown by their obsession with talking to animals. Too bad those animals never told them to put on a shirt.
Disney is accused of a lot of things. From being an extension of the Illuminati, to Disney World being an employment haven for pedophiles, and all the subliminal erotica in between. And they’re guilty of most of it. I don’t know for sure whether or not Aladdin was right and ‘all good teenagers take off their clothes,’ and maybe like Disney claims, that really IS the priest’s knee in The Little Mermaid. But if it isn’t, could you really blame him?
From Dumbo to Pocahontas to Finding Nemo - moms are MIA or KO’d, and the real victims are the kids. Thank God Disney has taken a hiatus from their princess flicks, because I don’t know if the moral fiber of the American society could stand another devastating blow. It’s time to break down walls and put on layers. When your daughter wants to dress like Ariel, put her in footie pajamas with the legs bound together. When she complains she looks nothing like the mermaid, tell her ‘this is how she woulda looked if she’d had a mommy.’ Cuz it’s true.
Moms, don’t keep your kids from the Disney movies. They made my childhood. They continue to make my adulthood. They are some of the most endearing works of smut out there. Just be aware that when your kids are playing make-believe, pretending they are the romanticized characters from the movies, they’re simultaneously pretending that you’re dead. But at least someday their prince will come."
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